My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
