i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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