you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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