i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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