Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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