cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
