I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize
