Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Randomize
