i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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