I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
