i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
