Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
