At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Sex in the backyard? Check.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
