yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
