That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
