I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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