we're blogging at a bar
What a fucking waste of an outfit
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize