okay pat passed out under dana's car
People in love make me want to vomit
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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