Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
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