And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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