I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
