Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Randomize
