so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
