gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize