Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
