just survived the first fart of the relationship.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
