After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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