she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Randomize
