I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
no more duck duck goose at the bar
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Randomize
