he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
