Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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