I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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