yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I look better un-naked...
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize