i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
