well you can't waste a boner
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
