Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
