Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Randomize