I love black thongs
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
