i wish peter jackson would direct porn
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
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