How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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