she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
