ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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