Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Randomize
