I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
