i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
