i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize