to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Idk if I want to put a bra on
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
