I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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