I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
how drunk are you?
Several
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
