Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
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